Three things you aren't doing that could be hindering your prayers.

Hey friend,

I have always been an empathetic person. Being empathetic has been both a blessing and a curse. You may, or may not, be able to relate, but if you can you know exactly what I mean.

Everyday things such as scrolling through Facebook, watching television, talking with a friend going through hard times, or simply walking downtown and seeing so many homeless people, can easily trigger heavy emotions. Those emotions will often lead to prayer sessions, or going above that and offering to help tangibly.

At one point my empathetic nature began to interrupt my life. I had a hard time not taking on other people’s emotions. I’ve gotten much better, but there are still times where I have to shake those feelings off, and realize that I can help when I’m led, but I don’t have to take on another person’s emotional state.

One thing that I have been noticing, repeatedly, is that so many people are desperate for a move of God.

So many people are on their last leg and don't know how much longer they can believe that God is a God who still answers prayer.

You may be one those people who has been praying about the same thing for weeks, months, or even years, and you're wondering where God is.

You see other people getting blessed and you can't help but feel forgotten, discouraged, and depressed.

I was recently watching a church service on periscope and on one part of the broadcast, the preacher was talking about the promises of God and the power of prayer. If you aren't familiar with periscope, you can leave comments and read the comments of those who are also watching the broadcast.

There were hundreds of people watching the service along with me and comments were flashing by rather quickly. However, one comment caught my attention.

One viewer wrote that she had been praying for healing for years, and she still wasn’t healed. I could feel her desperation. I decided to reply to her comment and give her some biblical advice. I simply said, “now it’s time to start declaring and decreeing," and she replied back “how do I do that?”

I realized in that moment that declaring and decreeing was a foreign concept for so many people, and so, I offered to send her a resource I had just finished working on as a bonus for my course, Increase & Flourish.

Friend, Perhaps you may be feeling the same way.

You’ve been praying the same prayer for a long time, with no manifestation of that prayer in sight.

Your faith is growing faint and you question whether your prayers are falling on death ears.

I must say there are many different reasons why your prayers may not have been answered yet --  one of those reasons may simply be that it’s just not time yet.

However, sometimes time isn’t the issue.

The hindrance may be in what you aren’t doing (or saying) in addition to your prayers.

Here are three important elements to make sure you are including along with your prayers.

To help keep things simple and easy to remember, each element starts with the letter P.

The first P is to…

1.     Pray God’s will to be done:

When you pray, ask according to God's will using the example from The Lord's prayer, “Thy will be done.” Praying this way ensures that God hears your prayer.”

“This is the confidence we have in God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.” (1 John 5:14, New International Version).

You may be asking, how do I know what God’s will is? And the answer is you can find out God’s will by reading His word. If it’s in His word, it is a promise for you that you can grab ahold of.

Which leads me to the second P. After you have prayed for God’s will to be done the scripture says he heard you. Now it’s time to…

2.     Plead your case:

Find a promise in the bible based on what you are praying for and bring that word before the court of heaven and begin to plead your case. The word of God is the law and you have legal access to every promise written in the book of law if you are in right standing with God.

“Put me in remembrance [remind Me of your merits]; let us plead and argue together. Set fourth your case, that you may be justified (proved right). (Isaiah 43:26, Amplified Bible)

Once you understand this principle you realize your authority to bring the law before the judge (God) and plead your case. God’s word will not return to Him void, so attach a scripture that pertains to your specific prayer request, and watch God perform His word over your situation as you begin to speak that scripture with authority.

Once you know your legal rights, next…

3.     Put a praise on it: 

We learned that God heard you the first time you prayed. He already intends to answer your prayer in His time. What happens is we go to God in prayer and ask Him for the same thing(s) day after day, not realizing that He already heard you. Now it's time to go a step further

Praise is the missing ingredient. Praising and thanking God is the ultimate way to show your faith. It's hard to praise God for something you don't believe He will provide. Praise is your faith in action, and without faith, it is impossible to please God. Believe God and praise your way to victory.

“Let us come before him with thanksgiving and extol him with music and song. For the Lord is the great God, the great King above all gods.” (Psalm 95: 2-3, New International Version).

To recap:

-- Pray God's Will
-- Plead Your Case
-- Praise and Thank God in advance

Friend, I hope you found this helpful!

Leave a comment and let me know what you’re believing God for this year and let me know if you intend to add these three elements to your prayers (if you haven’t already)? I’d love to hear from you.

From Wimp to Warrior...My Story!

It’s been a little over 2 years since I opened the doors to my coaching business. It was September 6th, 2016 to be exact. I remember being so hopeful and optimistic about this new chapter of my life. I went through extensive training, hired the best web designer, booked a top-notch photographer, hired an editor, and put my hand to the plow and didn’t look back. I knew I had finally discovered my true calling and I had so much peace about it.

However, knowing this was God’s will, and knowing I had prayed and waited on God, still didn’t change the journey I was about to embark upon.

I underestimated how difficult it would be to start from scratch and build something from the ground up. One of the first things you need to be successful in business is clients. Lots of them! And I didn’t even have one.

Month one…no clients.

Month two…no clients.

Month three…NO CLIENTS.

I think you get the pattern. No clients = no money coming in and that was a big problem.  I must

Admit I didn’t think clients would just fall out the sky, but I didn’t think it would be that hard to book my first client either.

So, I got serious about studying marketing and started researching the latest tips and tools from business coaches.

I learned a lot of valuable and helpful information that gave me clarity into what I was doing wrong and what I needed to start doing. The thing is I became paralyzed with fear and doubt wondering if I had what it took to operate a thriving coaching business.

From there I thought a business coach would help, so I hired one. She started giving me even more strategies and invaluable information of what I needed to implement in my business. The thing is… I left each call feeling intimidated and defeated.

I dreaded our calls because I knew she would challenge me to do more of the things I already knew to do but was afraid to do.

Here’s the thing.

I knew I was called and equipped for entrepreneurship. I knew I was operating in my element, but I didn’t anticipate the amount of warfare I would face.

While all of this was going on, I received so many messages from women and men, who were being impacted by my website, blogs, social media posts, and speeches. All of that was humbling and appreciated, but it didn’t change the fact that I wasn’t getting clients.  I live to inspire, but inspiration doesn’t pay bills.

The one thing I needed to do was be more visible, but I was hiding. People wanted to get to know the girl behind the posts, but I was hiding. I needed to do more live videos, but I was hiding. I

needed to be more consistent and intentional with my blogs and posts, but I could not seem to overcome the fear and insecurities I felt about putting myself out there and being vulnerable, and I could not understand where those emotions were coming from. Eventually, I went on a fast and started doing some strategic praying, because I needed some clear insight into the confusion, fear, and obstacles I kept facing.

Friend, this is where it gets good, so hang in here with me. God began to download so much during that fast and continued to do so for weeks and months thereafter. It’s as if God had been waiting for me to invite Him in all along. It’s like He pulled back the curtain and gave me a glimpse of what was going on behind the scenes, so I could understand what the warfare was about.

He spoke to me about the seriousness of this season of my life, and how imperative it was that I rise up and go higher in him.

In my own words, in that season, I was a wimp as opposed to being a warrior and He needed me to be a warrior and take back what the enemy had stolen and was trying to steal. My destiny. My influence. My future.

Up until that point when things would happen, my emotions sometimes got the best of me. One day I was confident and clear on who I was and what I was called to do in and then the next day I would question my identity, and even questioned whether I had made all of this up and missed God.

In order to not make this blog 10 pages long…let me cut to the chase and tell you what this has to do with you, and why you should care.

God led me to me to do in-depth Bible studies, to read books on discipline, time management, spiritual warfare, and similar subjects all while fasting and praying. He gave me so many revelations and I became stronger and strategic.

As I was starting to make noticeable progress in my life, I felt I heard God say to teach what He had taught me. I dismissed the thought at first. But the thought never went away. In fact, I kept waking up in the middle of the night to grab my phone and write what I was hearing, and He made it clear that this was my assignment.

***********************************************************************************

I am BEYOND EXCITED to make this announcement and let you in on what I’ve been working on for quite some time. I have created a course with YOU in mind! But I can’t take the credit. God had me create this course for YOU! Because something tells me that you’ve been in a fight too sweet friend, and you’ve been wondering “what in the heck is really going on?”

You know that God has more for you to do. You know there is more in you than you’ve been able to express, but you can’t seem to make any significant progress. Every time you make up your mind to get your stuff together, everything seems to come against you, all at once. That’s where I found myself this time last year. 

I was fed up with myself. I drew a line in the sand and said I don’t care what I must do, I am not going into another year with the same mindset and the same goals.

Something. Has. To. Give.

I’m proud to say that I have transformed so much this year that I barely recognize myself. I have increased in key areas of my life, and that has resulted in me increasing both personally and professionally. I am flourishing!

And I want you to do the same. That’s why I created a course to teach you the secrets and exact things I did to get to this place.

The name of the course is, Increase & Flourish. {give me a minute while I grab some

tissue}. You have no idea how proud I am of this work.

Friend, I created this course for women and men like you! Who are ready to increase and break out of mediocrity and complacency to reach their next level. The truth is now that I have coaching clients who pay me good money to help them get unstuck, I know that so many people are struggling with similar issues that are holding them back. They don’t know how to move forward. They are frustrated and tired of being in the same place every year, struggling with the same goals, same habits, and the same mindsets. Can you relate?

 Do you feel like you’re on a hamster wheel going nowhere?

Are you constantly frustrated with your lack of progress, knowing that you have the potential to be so much more? If so, I believe this course will be an answer to your prayer.

You will know right away if this course is for you. Let me encourage you to not hesitate on investing in yourself and your future. If you are under spiritual warfare, you need a strategy to move forward, GET

THIS COURSE NOW!  All the details are here.

The best part is the course is 30% off until 11:59 December 15, 2018. After that, the price goes back to the original price which is 97.00. Right now, it is only $67.00, and this is a steal. The real value of this course is way over $300.00.

 This is just a small way to say,Thank you for being a part of my community.

Let’s continue to grow together. Let me show you how to Increase & Flourish.

Are you being selfish? You may not know that you are.

 

 I have to be honest with you. I’m a life coach who struggles with a lot of the same things you do. It has taken me a while to realize that I don’t have to be perfect in order to be an effective coach or to lead others.

In fact, that is the reason I believe God called me to coach and lead so many strong, beautiful women like yourself. I can relate to a lot of the things you’re going through, and that relatability allows me to show up for you in ways that make you feel seen, heard, and understood.

That is what allows me to write to you effortlessly, because it’s as if I’m writing to myself. That is why I take this work seriously.

Before I go into a coaching session I invite God into the session as well, because I know that if He doesn’t show up, there is no reason for me to show up. Whenever I get ready to write or speak words that someone else will read or hear, I’m intentional about what I’m going to say. I want to give you God, not myself, because I have nothing of value to give on my own. I would be wasting your time and mine, and who has time for that?

I haven’t always been this bold with my work and message. It took me a while to understand that my voice matters, and so for years I kept my mouth closed and preached to myself in the mirror (lol). I even started a blog back in 2010, but I never shared any of my work with anyone.

Then something strange started happening.

God would reveal something to me in my quiet time, and I would get excited about it, write it in my journal or blog and then go on with my day. Yet I still didn’t share it with anyone. Then I would turn on the radio, or the television, or listen to a podcast and someone would start saying the exact same thing that God had said to me. After this kept happening, I finally heard God loud and clear – God wasn’t speaking to me just so I could hide the words in my heart or in my journal.

Those words were an answer to someone’s prayer. There was someone who needed those words to come from my mouth or my keyboard before they would receive them, and I was being selfish to not release them. I realized that if I wouldn’t be obedient, God would use someone else. I also realized that that was God’s way of confirming that He was indeed speaking to me.
  
Are you being selfish Friend? Are you holding onto a gift you possess, afraid to give it freely? Do you know that your gift matters?

Your voice matters.

Maybe you have a burning desire in your heart to do, be, or say something that has the potential to help someone else, but you feel unqualified.

Or maybe you feel like you don’t have anything of value to give. You may feel like your gift isn’t as impressive as others', or you don’t have what it takes to succeed.

You may feel that what you have to give won’t be received, or that you will be rejected and ignored because you aren’t anyone special.

Let me politely interrupt your stream of consciousness and suggest that all of those reasons make you the perfect candidate for God to use.

I too have thought all of these things. I looked at my gift as “not good enough.” I thought about all of my weaknesses, and the things that I didn’t know how to do when I was starting my business.

Then one day I decided to use what I did have and trust God to help me in the areas where I was weak or not as good as I wanted to be. Your weaknesses and imperfections are what allow God to use you, because you will have to depend on Him.

In 2nd Corinthians 12:8-9 Paul is speaking about the thorn in his flesh that he pleaded with God to take away. However, instead of removing the thorn, God says, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in [your] weakness (NLT).”

Then Paul goes on to write, “So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me.”

Like Paul, I am no longer afraid to talk about my struggles and imperfections because they make me depend more on God. God gets the glory when we are the least likely candidate for His mission, but we show up anyway and do what He’s gifted us to do.

Today I want you to stop hiding what God has given you. I want you to stop looking at your “thorns” and start sharing your gifts.

If you sing…sing.

If you write…write.

If you dance…dance.

If you cook…cook.

If you are gifted to organize and plan… organize and plan. There are people depending on you to get over yourself and let God use you. Imperfections and all.

I’m a life coach but I still struggle with inconsistency and lack of discipline. I still struggle with fear and doubt.
I’m a Christian but I still lose my temper sometimes. I’m a speaker, but sometimes I stutter, and my words don’t come out as eloquently as I would like them to.

God isn’t looking for perfection. He’s looking for those who will humble themselves and stay in His presence. He’s looking for empty vessels to fill.

Decide today to brush the dust off those dreams you hung up years ago, throw away your excuses bag, and do what He’s calling you to do. His grace is sufficient for you. Will you let Him use you, even though you aren’t perfect?

My answer is yes, and I hope that yours is too.

Do You Sometimes Forget This Too? That #ChoicesMatter.

Hey Friend,

I’m writing from my favorite local coffee shop; sitting on a cozy, chic little grey couch, and sipping on a hot peach ginger tea coupled with a gluten-free blueberry muffin. Right before arriving, I visited the corner market in the same parking lot to grab a gluten- free turkey and avocado wrap before settling down to write.

Both times – at the corner market as well as at the coffee shop – I was surrounded by options. Delicious options. Convenient options. Familiar options. Truthfully, most of the other options were a lot more appealing than those in the gluten- free aisle. In prior times, I would have been tempted to go into compromise mode.

Embracing my new way of eating hasn’t been easy (at times it seemed impossible), but isn’t that always the case when you decide to change old habits and mindsets? It’s true – our lives change when our habits change.  

A couple of months ago, I would have most likely chosen one of the other options because there are always more non gluten- free options than there are gluten- free ones. I would have convinced myself that I didn’t have any other choice unless I wanted to only eat salads for the rest of my life (which of course couldn’t be further from the truth).  Are you guilty of this too? Somehow convincing yourself that you don’t have any other choice?

As I look back on my many failed attempts at eating better, I realize:

We ALWAYS have a choice. 

Every day life provides us with many options, and each day we make lots of choices. We choose what time we are going to set our clocks to get up in the morning. We choose which brand of toothpaste to use. We choose what we will eat for breakfast. We choose which school our children will attend. We choose who we hang out with, where we work, what we do with our spare time…I think you get the point here. We always have a choice. But sometimes we forget this important fact.

I made a commitment to make healthy eating a lifestyle at the beginning of this year. I decided to stop occasionally flirting with the idea of eating better and just make it official. The Lord had shown me several times that the foods I was eating were the reason for my lack of energy and brain fog. But I kept going back to what was causing my body to be inflamed, sick, and out of balance. Isn’t that crazy? The very thing that was making me feel horrible was the very thing I kept choosing. Every. Single. Time.  

Now, I know I’m not the only one guilty of occasionally losing my sanity (ha ha).  Can you think of any habits of your own that you know are keeping you from being your best self? Perhaps even making you sick, keeping you unhealthy, or preventing you from progressing in your life? Perhaps you keep choosing to stay with that boyfriend whose character is questionable. Or keeping that friend in your life who you know isn’t happy for your wins. What about choosing to run to social media first thing in the morning instead of your bible, so the enemy can continue to plant seeds of competition and discontent in your heart? What about waking up at the very last minute and starting your day off in a rush and stressed?

No matter what your “thing” is, understand that you are one choice away from a different outcome. One choice. Then, once you make your choice, you must keep making that same choice each and every day until it becomes your new habit – the choice you make without even thinking about it, because it’s your new normal.

I’m proud to say that my choice to eat healthier has allowed me to feel better than I have in a long time. This has been the longest I’ve stayed on course without giving up. I haven’t been 100% perfect, but I’ve made huge strides towards progress and I’m not looking to turn back now.

Here’s what I want you to take away from this…Life will always present you with options, but you get to choose which one you want. If you always choose the familiar, convenient, and easiest option, you will always get the same results. Things will only change when you change your mindset, habits, and appetites.

No matter what goals you have set for yourself this year, there will come a time when you will have to choose between who you used to be and who you are trying to become. In those moments when you’re tempted to choose something based on your old appetites, remind yourself that you are no longer that person who makes choices based on familiarity. Remind yourself of the person you are becoming.

Ask yourself, would the person I’m becoming eat this Twinkie ? If not, what would she choose to eat instead? Would the person I’m becoming skip the gym today, or would she push through? Would the person I’m becoming waste another day being discouraged and hopeless, or would she stir herself up in the Lord and choose joy instead?

Friend, your life is the sum total of the choices you make every day. The choices you make today will frame your tomorrow. Make the choices that will get you closer to the picture you would like to see.

One choice today. Another choice tomorrow. Sooner than later you will no longer be practicing; you will have become.

Feeling Like A Failure at Life? This May be Why...

Hey Friend,

Do you sometimes feel like you’re running behind, like you need to catch up?

Are you discontent with certain areas of your life?

Do you feel like you’re the only person on the planet who hasn’t gotten married, had a baby, started a business, figured out how to grow your business, lost the baby weight, figured out this parenting thing, written a book, discovered your purpose, learned to manage your time better, blah, blah, blah?

 As a coach and a friend to several women, I’m learning that we all (or most of us) at times ­feel like we are failing at life.

Listening to the inner dialogue of these women, I started to wonder where all of this was coming from.

The first place I started searching for answers was the Scripture. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t see anywhere in the Bible where it says you must be married by 25, have a baby by 27, another kid by 29, and the third child by 35.

 I don’t see anywhere where it says you must be working and living out some grand purpose before 40, have your house in perfect condition 24/7, and cook a full course meal every other day or else you’re a failure, you’re out of time, or you need to catch up. Can you find any of this anywhere in your Bible? Because I must be missing a few chapters in mine.

Intrigued, I wanted to dig a little deeper.

As I began to study, it was placed on my heart to address this issue because I can understand how – with the world running behind man-made laws  where you have your life planned out and expect it to go as planned – if your life doesn’t go as planned you feel like a failure. But the irony is that I’m hearing a lot of this from Christians; including myself.

 Would you include yourself in this category as well? Where you sometimes forget that you are not under man-made laws, nor man-made time clocks or biological clocks?

I breathed a sigh of relief once I started reading what God had to say about my life and His plans for me. It is good news that I don’t have to plan my own life. Because honestly the world’s system results in inevitable frustration and depression because it’s not realistic to think that life will always go as planned.

 Let’s look at a few scriptures that prove this point:

Proverbs 16: 9:   “In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps.”

Proverbs 19: 21:  “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”

Jeremiah 29:11:  “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Ecclesiastes 3:1:  “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.”

Isaiah 28:29:  “All this comes from the Lord Almighty, whose plan is wonderful, whose wisdom is magnificent.”

These scriptures remind us that we can relax and let go of the picture-perfect idea in our heads of how we think our lives should go. We don’t have to compete, connive, or get our underwear in a bunch because such-and-such is outdoing us, or has three kids and we don’t even have one yet.

 When you lose your peace of mind and are full of anxiety because you feel left behind, the enemy will create a false sense of urgency in your life to make you take matters into your own hands.  He knows that if you wait on God, you just might reach your God-given destiny and be so happy that you tell everyone your testimony.

Just take Eve for example.

The enemy convinced Eve in the garden that she was missing out by not eating from the one tree that God had forbidden. She had so many other trees to choose from, but she was focused on the one thing that she couldn’t/didn’t have. I believe in modern day terms we call it F.O.M.O (fear of missing out).

What has the enemy convinced you that you NEED to have in your life right now that seems out of reach? What is he whispering to you about the time it’s taking for God to show up and answer that prayer? Are you just about out of patience and ready to take matters into your own hands? You know, to help God out?

Well let me remind you of how Eve’s act of disobedience ruined God’s perfect plan for her and for mankind.

We all know how the story ends. Eve walks right out from under God’s perfect will for her life and into the will of the enemy by eating that forbidden fruit. His plan worked and God’s plan for her life, along with ours, changed forever that day. Thankfully, God also had another plan, but we still must suffer the consequences for that one act of rebellion.

Today the enemy has an easier job because we have social media and other ways of being bombarded with images of what we don’t have, and with pictures of everybody’s “perfect” life.

The internet and social media will have you walking straight out of the will of God, all in the name of “catching up.” Friend, don’t fall for the traps of comparison, competition, discontent, or any other traps set out to destroy God’s perfect plan for your life.

I can assure you that God has a plan for your life.  Even if you feel you have messed up so many times, He can, and will, redeem the time and restore the plan for your life.

Today, decide to trust God and His perfect timing in your life. Decide to make the pursuit of peace your new normal by focusing on what God is doing in your life, instead of what it seems He is not doing.

Take a break from social media, certain television shows, and anything that is planting seeds of discontent in your heart. Trust that God’s plan – as well as His timing of it – for your life is perfect.

Friend, you are not running behind; you are right on schedule.  As long as you don’t hop off the train too soon, you will reach your destination. And it will be worth the wait.

Wait on God.

Until next time,

Tiffany

New Year Wishes + My one word for 2018!

Happy New Year!

Hey friend,

I wanted to wish you a Happy New Year! And leave a few nuggets with you as we celebrate a brand-new year!

I’m sure by now you have probably heard a few declarations and prophecies about the New Year, and hopefully you are excited and full of expectation about what 2018 will bring.

I must say, I feel something this year that is a bit different than most of the rest. I don’t usually buy into the corporate “this is your season for breakthrough,” or “this year God is going to do X, Y, and Z” hype, because let’s be real, we can’t all be in the exact same season.

However, don’t get me wrong, I totally believe in being hopeful and full of faith, but I also know that God won’t move until He is ready. So, no matter how loud the preacher yells, screams, sweats, and declare about this being our year, it won’t mean a thing, or come to pass until the predetermined time.

So while we wait, we believe God’s timing and PREPARE for what we’ve been believing Him for.

Friend, 2018 will depend on you.

Your level of preparation will determine your readiness to receive and walk into the next season of your life.

This is a word I received personally from the Lord. And I believe it is the same for many of you too. Many of you have been in a "dark cave" for many years. You have only a flicker of hope left, and if this year isn’t different from all the rest, you don’t know how much longer you can believe.

Let me encourage you, sis. You have come too far to turn back now. So, grab ahold of every ounce of faith you can muster up and begin to declare and decree 2018 to not be just another year, but declare it to be THE year everything changes for you.

Whatever you speak over yourself this year will come to pass- good or bad- so speak blessings. Prepare. Then Aim.

Speaking of AIMING, I spent a few days journaling and reflecting on 2017-the highs and the lows. I also wrote out specific goals and focal points for 2018. Fourteen pages later, I was able to decide on my one word for 2018. My one word is AIM.

Here's why;

2016 was a year of stepping out on faith for me. I just wanted to finally start using the gifts I had been sitting on. (side note: there is a message in that last sentence to just START. Start whatever the Lord is tugging on your heart to do. You may not see the full picture but you won't figure it out by waiting on perfect).

Carrying on...

In 2017 I was still trying to figure things out by throwing darts and seeing what stuck.

Which brings me to 2018, which I'm declaring to be the year to AIM. To pinpoint my (specific) goal, aim all my efforts and pursuits toward the goal, then shoot.

After I decided on my one word, I then came up with an acronym for AIM that I could apply to each goal on my list to erase any confusion and uncertainty about what I'm aiming for (which I experienced a lot of last year).

For each goal that I aim for this year I will first:

Ask:
God for clear vision and direction on what his will is in regards to my goal(s) (RIP to directionless shooting). Ask him to help me when I don’t know what to do, or how to do it, instead of worrying myself about it.

Then be…

Intentional:
about slowing down to listen and wait for an answer and solution to help me reach my goal or solve the problem.

And lastly…

Move quickly and swiftly when I believe I’ve heard from Him. Not giving myself time to question whether I really heard him or not, time to procrastinate, or time to second guess myself. But to take action immediately.

I’m so excited about my word that I just had to share it with you. I have put my word in every place I frequently visit throughout the house, including the refrigerator. And if you wanna hear something funny...my husband opened the refrigerator a few moments ago and said “why do I see the word AIM in the fridge? What am I trying to aim, at the toilet?” (insert hand over forehead emoji). That man always has a joke.

But seriously,my hope is that me sharing my word with you, will inspire you to aim for your biggest & brightest dreams this year, and I also hope it will encourage you to even come up with your own word (if you haven’t already).

But don’t stop there, once you decide on your word, paste it everywhere to keep it in front of you at all times (try this and see how much it helps you stay focused).

And don’t forget that 2018 will depend on Y-O-U. So take this first week to figure out your strategy and then aim everything you do towards your goal. Make it a great year my friend.


Rooting for you always,


Tiffany
 
 

Two Women, One Lesson

A few months ago, I ran into a distant cousin at my great aunt’s funeral and learned that she had been fighting Lupus for a long time. My heart broke for her as she explained that she had been in and out of the hospital a lot. I was struck as she shared her story by how strong her faith was. Instead of complaining, she was praising God in the midst of her trials. She let her faith shine as she trusted in her God.

Ever since that day I have been following her journey and praying for her. This week I received news that she has passed. She was 27. Now what I remember the most about her was her smile. Her spirit. As I browsed through her Facebook page this week, every comment is filled with evidence that she knew God and that she ran a good race. Her race may have been short, but she touched the hearts of many and bore good fruit during her fleeting stay here on Earth. Rest in heaven Jasmine Haynes. Job well done.

A couple of months ago, I met a new friend name Cassandra through one of my cousins. We clicked immediately. We are both introverted and have reserved personalities, which is the total opposite of the cousin who introduced us. We shared mutual experiences of trying to meet genuine people we felt safe opening up to, and were delighted to discover that we had so much in common. We exchanged numbers and we started texting each other and talked on several occasions. I was so grateful that God brought us together. We tried to make plans to meet up for lunch, but our busy schedules kept us from nailing down a date. Four months ago, I received a text from my cousin that Cassandra had just suffered a massive stroke. She was 41. I honestly could not believe my eyes and what I had just read. My heart and my eyes swelled with tears and I asked God why? Why her? Why now? She has a baby boy and two adolescent girls. My heart is heavy with regret over not dropping my plans to make time to have lunch with her.  I was so looking forward to getting to know her, but in the midst of my questioning and sadness, I humbled my heart to trust God’s will and prayed like crazy for him to save her. I'm grateful to say that Cassandra is still alive, but she has a long road ahead of her, including overcoming brain damage from her stroke. I believe God is a miracle worker and I'm still believing God for her complete mental and physical restoration.

Two women.

Two unique stories.

One common lesson.

Life can change dramatically before we take our next breath.

Both of these women had plans for tomorrow and responsibilities on their shoulders. Both were looking forward to their futures. Did they appreciate the moments they had? When they heard the common platitude “Life is short,” did they know just how short it could be? Had they made up their minds to live as if they were dying?  

We all have a lot of things on our plates. We're wives, mothers, friends, daughters, entrepreneurs, employees, and the list can go on. Most likely you're overwhelmed with all of the pressure and responsibilities that fall on you every day. Sometimes you may feel as if you don't know what to do first. When we are sleepwalking through each day or just going through the motions of our lives, it’s hard to pay attention and live with a constant gratitude for the moments God gives us on this earth. How do we live as if we are dying?

Here are a couple of solutions to end the cycle of overwhelm and busyness that have been helpful to me as I have processed the events of the the last couple of months and weeks of my life.

1) Every morning ask God to show you what's important today.

Ask Him to guide your steps and allow you to focus on how you can bear fruit that day and live on purpose. Remember he knows exactly how much time you have left. So He definitely knows how you should arrange your time. Trust me, when God calls you to do something important, like going to lunch with a friend who may really need your attention, the laundry can wait. The enemy loves to distract us with what's urgent instead of what's important.

Ask yourself, "Am I more focused on what seems urgent (dishes, email, making more money) or on what's important (playing with your child, sending that encouraging text to a friend going through). Ask God for help to know the difference today and every day.

2) When you talk (or think) about your day, try to change your wording from "I have to..." to "I get to..."

I can hardly believe how this small word swap has changed my perspective since I've started doing this. For example, here’s how it looked today: As I walked around my house, I saw stuff everywhere. My husband literally thinks our guest bathroom is his closet (lol). But instead of getting upset that he left his huge size 10 shoes in the bathroom AGAIN for me to trip over, I said thank you God that I get to clean up after my husband. Thank You that I have a husband, and a good one at that. Thank you God that I get to cook dinner for my family. I would much rather enjoy this Sunday on the couch, but I get to serve my family by cooking and cleaning. Practicing gratitude is a game changer.

Jasmine and Cassandra would love to be able to do the very things we complain about. I bet they would give anything to be able to cook, clean, and go to work.

I know that their lives and what happened to them was not in vain. Jasmine’s legacy will live on forever, and I believe that Cassandra will be completely restored to life as it was before the stroke in Jesus’ name. But until then, her life and the fight in her, has inspired me on so many levels.

Lovely friend, live your life with gratitude and passion. Choose to live like today could be your last. Make up your mind to enjoy every minute of your days and let others be inspired by how you live your life.

I love you dearly.

Tiffany

P.S  Will you join me as I continue to pray for Cassandra and her family? And please pray for the Haynes family as they say goodbye to their precious loved one.

A life full of burdens, is a life full of purpose.

Hi Friend,

Let's talk a little about purpose. As you may or may not know, one of the services I offer at Oh So You coaching, is to help women discover their purpose. I've discovered that purpose is the missing piece that is causing frustration in the lives of so many men and women. The key to finding your purpose is discovering your burden. You can discover your burden by paying close attention to what grabs your attention and hold your thoughts captive.

Is there something you are dying to change or communicate?

That is your burden. That is your calling, AND you must do something about it.

Is there something that fires you up? Something that others can walk right past, that stops you dead in your tracks?

A while back I was leaving an NBA basketball game at the Phillips arena. Along with everyone else walking to their cars, I was walking and laughing arm-in-arm with my husband when I noticed a homeless woman sitting outside (in the winter time) with two small children asking for money. Just the sight of those children sitting out there in the cold instantly brought tears to my eyes. I thought about this woman and those kids all night long. People were walking right by them. A few stopped, but the majority of folks kept walking to their luxury cars to go to their warm cozy homes, while not realizing they had a responsibility to do something.  You see some of these same people may have been searching for their purpose, not realizing that God may have answered their prayer by putting people directly in their path.

Of course I understand that not everyone has the same calling and purpose, but the principal doesn't change. There is something or someone right under your nose that is your assignment. Your calling.  If you have been praying for God to reveal your assignment here on this earth, you must know that HE will answer you. It's your job to keep your eyes and ears open to receive the answer HE reveals to you.

Have you ever found yourself thinking that "someone needs to do something about this or that," or do you often ask that infamous question,  "If God is so good, why does he allow these (bad) things to happen?"

Scripture says, "for we are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." Ephesians 2: 10.

He created us in advance for good works. These works are to combat the evil going on around us and to help those in need. There are people in need everywhere you go. Up until now you may have just walked right past your purpose, but not anymore. I'm challenging you to pray this prayer... Lord open my eyes to the needs and problems of those around me." And give me the courage to not keep walking and hoping somebody will come and do something. Let me be that somebody."

If you're like me with so many areas near and dear to your heart, you may have to spend more time searching for clarity. But while you are waiting, you can do something. It's in the doing where you'll find your life's mission. Since launching this coaching ministry and business, God has confirmed my calling and even birthed new visions in my heart. I might not have ever discovered these burdens if I had not started with the first tug on my heart to help frustrated Christian women create more harmony in their lives. From that first calling, my work has moved on to reaching more women on a deeper level based on the conversations I've had the opportunity to have with prospective clients and actual clients. And to think I almost passed up on pursuing this passion, because I had my heart set on becoming an actress. I'm so glad I decided to trust God with my life. Although some may think Life coaching isn't as "impressive" as acting, I'm having the time of my life operating in my gifts.

Friend, if you are having a hard time discovering your purpose, it could be because you're waiting on a BIG platform. We usually miss God when he answers if we are looking for a big, impressive calling. But God doesn't measure callings or assignments by how “impressive” we think they are. He presses assignments on our hearts that are directly tied to His heart. When God uses someone or something to tug on your heart, those tugs become your burden, and you can't seem to stop thinking about it. Friend, that is your purpose. And you owe it to the world to do something about it.

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I never forgot the words of this song that came on the radio in 2011 when I was riding in my car. These words struck a cord in my heart, and I knew I had to do more. I pray you will listen to the words and they will also challenge you to do more. And if you're already doing your part...Rock on sister!!